so many changes....

SO once again I have been MIA for weeks, I have been reading blogs, just really been at a loss of what i could blog about. The month of June seemed to fly by getting things ready for big sister to go to TN, getting settled back in from being in TN, getting ready to go to TN again for the fourth of July for a quick weekend, as well as preparing for a big change in our lives... little did we know the REAL MAJOR life change that was headed our way.

On June the 28th I called my dad and told him happy birthday, and that I wouldnt be there for long but I was super happy to be coming to see him and my mom as well as Clints Parents. Clint talked all week about being super excited to get to go home and spend the weekend with his dad... even if it were just for a few days, it was worth it in Clints eyes for that time with his dad. Clint is very very close to his dad.



So I spoke with my mother in law two nights before we were heading to TN, about C's new deployment schedule, and then I talked to his dad about it.... I told them both I love them, but not to tell CLint... I wanted him to be able to tell them, but I told so I could brace them for what he was fixing to tell them...

So Thursday July the 1st was a normal Thursday,..... hubster was at work getting things ready to go on leave for the weekend, and I was running to the grocery store to get a few things to cook an anniversary dinner for my love since we would be out of town on our actual anniversary. July 5th.

On thursday afternoon I got a call that I have always feared, "Todd has passed away, come quickly, call and tell Deana and Robby, as well as CLINT.....I argued with the woman on the phone informing her there was a mistake, My Father in law was young and invinsable it seemed this could NOT be Todd.... CLINTS TODD, MY TODD, MY Kids PAPA TODD... No way no how....Clints aunt countines to reasure me it was true. I lost it ... We were coming home tomm... .so we could see them TOMM!!!! I collapsed in the driveway as i am talkig to clints aunt because i couldnt breath and could not bealive this has just happened. I called B ( the bestie) and immediately took the kids to her house.... I am rushing to clints work... which of course the 12 minutes it takes to get there felt like an eternity, in the mean time driving to clints work to tell him becuase i refused to over the phone... you cant tell someone their hero there world there person is gone over the phone... but i had to call his sister and brother.... those were the worst phone calls i have ever had to make in my entire life.

Finally I get to clints work walk right in and hes white as a ghost,his mom had called in while i was on my way..... he was crushed.... so i get him home go on a turbo packing spree and we are TN bound,,, by no means for reasons that we wanted... the next 2 weeks were a major blur, we went thru the motions but it didnt feel real. Here we are at 3 weeks and it still doesnt feel real, now we are home in NC, preparing for clints job change, as well as his twin sister leaving Monday for over seas for a year... There are WAY too many changes going on...

Todd will forever be missed, he was a wonderful father, father in law, Husband, grandpa... so now we are taking in day by day to try to cope, but its difficult